Ebb & Flow

The past eight or nine months of being off of my fibromyalgia medications has been a learning experience. I'm still feeling around for my limits of pain and fatigue and unfortunately, that changes throughout the month making things more complicated than need be. Don't get me wrong, there are definitely good reasons for me to be off my medication. Overall, I'm less fatigued than I had been. I've had a decrease of other side effects as well. It has just taken me a long time to get to know my fibro in this new situation.

Every so often, I go through this internal struggle with my illness. I begin to wonder if I do actually need to limit my activities because of the fibro. I wonder if it's actually the illness that is limiting or it's my own perception of the illness. Basically I wonder, am I lazy or am I sick? And so then I go and do something not really wise.

Last week, I skipped my crash day. It had been a really busy weekend and I rested a bit that Monday, but I thought that Tuesday I could just get up and get on with the things I'd like to do that day. That Tuesday I was fine. Unfortunately, that Wednesday, Jeff's car became compromised and it was old enough and broken enough that it was better to replace it than fix it. Which led to one very long day at a car dealership buying a car and then another long afternoon the next day bringing in our old car to trade in. Basically, I probably would have been okay that week, if not for the emergency. But this week I'm still trying to pick myself back up after a rather long last week, and I wonder how things would have turned out if I'd taken my day to rest.

So that's sort of where my mind set has been the past several weeks. I am tired. I do rationally know that it's due to being ill, but it's still difficult to really wrap my head around that. I am excited and a bit nervous about some new responsibilities and activities I've taken on and will be taking on. Some of them will be short term and other a bit long term. I love being able to get out of the house and interact with other people. I miss trouble shooting, and I'm definitely getting the ability to do it now!

So for now I've decided I'm going to be cautious, but still try new things. Push my limits a bit here and there. Just keep swimming!

Tasty Alphabet

I was trying to think of a way to make Doug's lunch more appealing today. This week we have sliced turkey for lunch, and while Doug will eat turkey Lunchables until the cows come home, he won't eat the deli turkey we get. I started out by thinking I might just cut the turkey into little circles for him (like the Lunchable) but then I thought if I was going to go to the trouble that I'd do our letter of the week.

I was a bit doubtful of using plastic cookie cutters on the meat but it worked out quite well. I also did a few slices of American cheese. Doug was absolutely delighted. My only regret is that I didn't think of this sooner! I am definitely going to incorporate this on the rest of our letters!

Friday Fun

It's been a long week around here. Jeff's car rather unexpectedly needed to be replaced. The air compressor stopped working just in time for our 90 degree weather. We were hoping it was a simple cheap fix, but it was not and the car was 13 years old with over 130 k miles on it. Unfortunately I didn't leave extra padding in my week for 'semi emergency car buying' and I'm kinda pooped. But it all ended well and we have a nice actually new car. Due to the long week and a rainy morning, I decided that Doug and I would make brownies. Doug rather enthusiastically agreed. 

Chef Doug suggested putting mini chocolate chips in the brownies. I'm looking forward to the results.


While we were making brownies, Doug's new car-seat arrived. Since Jeff now has a reliable car, we thought we'd probably take it out as a family now and then and we didn't want to have to schlep the car seat back and forth.  I found a model that can become a booster seat in a few years, I thought it was a decent idea.

As you can see, Sir approves of his new car seat. 

Sir is also very excited about the box it came in.

And like many new home owners, he couldn't wait to make modifications on it.

Happy Friday! 

Have You Seen This Baby?

This baby used to live with us: 

I'm not sure what happened to him. I think this child may have eaten him:

Happy third birthday to my baby!

Making it Count

I was struggling trying to figure out how and when to introduce the concept of zero to Doug. I thought that if I introduced zero first and he got a number surprise box full of nothing that it would seriously piss Doug off and put him off the number surprise box. I thought that if I delayed its introduction too long, that Doug wouldn't understand that it goes before all the other numbers he knows and not after and that it is indeed less.

 Then one afternoon, it hit me. A number line! I thought about how I wanted to construct it and then I fired up my trusty ole laminator. I used card stock and printed up numbers 0-20 using a rainbow of colors. After I laminated them, I cut them out and attached some velcro using the sides of the laminated pages as tabs:

A bit hard to see due to the camera flash, but nap time seems like its going to be cut short, so I don't have time to re-shoot. There are two tabs on the front side and two on the back side. They all fit very nicely together. I started with the 0-20, but we can add more, all the way up to 100, as we learn along.

Evidently the 20 is just off to the side of the frame, but you get the idea.

Doug loves playing with it. It becomes a roller coaster, a parking lot or train tracks depending on what he wants to drive over it. 

I like to play a number game with it. I put out the number line and we count up and touch each of the numbers as we assemble it, taking special care to point out our number of the week. Once it's all together I ask Doug to bring me the week's number in certain objects.

For example, I asked him to bring me eight cars:

And then eight fish:

And then we ran out of Disney/Pixar toys, but you get the idea. We never put anything on the 0 obviously, but we talk about how it's a place holder. I know that Doug doesn't grasp that concept quite yet, but I've begun to plant the seed. I plan to cover the number zero after we do the number ten.
Happy counting!

Am I the Only One....

Who wants to go and put a broom on the end of my cart and joust with other mothers in the store? 

I'm a Monster

I've been microwaving this adorable bear. The bear looks kind of depressed sitting on the plate there. I found these bears around Christmas. You can nuke the bears and they have corn in them which gives off a nice moist heat for aches. I bought one for a friend of mine and I thought about buying one for myself, but at the time, I decided I wouldn't really need it.

Anyway, this is my first winter since my fibromyalgia diagnosis that I have not been taking medication for it. I didn't really think anything of it, but apparently the colder temperatures mean that I ache much more than usual. After several night of hauling the heating pad into bed with me, I gave in and purchased one of these delightful bears.

Doug was very excited when he saw the Amazon box on our porch the other day. The last time we got a package, it had Beta Bet in it, so he was hopeful for another fun thing. I made the mistake of telling him there was a bear in the box. We opened it and Doug claimed the bear for himself. I told him that he could play with it, but that it was mine. I told him that it was a special bear that I could put it in the microwave and it would help me feel better. That just freaked Doug out, "NOOOO DON'T MICROWAVE THE BEAR!!!".  So alas, I feel like a horrible person every time I nuke it. Well, I feel horrible until I put the bear on my shoulder, then I feel much better.