The Quest

Odysseus had the Odyssey, Monty Python had the Holy Grail, and I had my very own quest. For a pregnancy test.

About a week or so ago, I started not feeling well. I was feeling tired, nauseated and dizzy. These symptoms are sometimes associated with my thyroid being under-active, however I'd just had blood work done, and my thyroid was fine. I began to think about it. The last time my blood work came back fine and I felt unwell was last summer, when I was....pregnant. I shoved the idea to the back of my mind and went on with life. That weekend I started having to go to the bathroom all the time. I'd look at a glass of water, and have to go to the bathroom. Again, I decided to ignore it. I was probably just drinking more water. It was hot out after all.

That Monday Jeff and I went out shopping. I swear, I went to the bathroom in every store. I'd gone to Target earlier that day, and I'd meant to get a pregnancy test, but I'd gotten distracted by something or another and failed to get one. Later than afternoon we were out shopping some where else when I remembered that I'd wanted to buy pregnancy tests. We happened to be near a Costco and at some point pre-pregnancy I'd noted that they'd sold pregnancy tests. I ended up going in by myself to get some. I couldn't stand the thought of going into Costco to buy a gross of pregnancy tests with a three month old. So I go to the aisle where they should be. I couldn't find them. I circled the whole section twice. I could have asked the person at the pharmacy, but I couldn't come up with a reason why I'd need a life time's supply of pregnancy tests. Tired and defeated, I left Costco.

Jeff suggested that we head to the Weis that was on our way home. I got out, alone again, and went into Weis to obtain a pregnancy test. I looked in the usual aisle and...not there. I looked in another likely aisle and, not there. They were remodeling the store and some weird things were stuck in the produce section temporarily. Alas, no pregnancy tests among the broccoli. Panicked and tired, I flagged down an employee. She told me that some things had been moved to the meat section. We looked there. No tests. She then guided me to the pharmacy, nope. After twenty minutes of circumnavigating the store, I left before I had a screaming and kicking tantrum in the aisle.

Jeff could now see that my sanity was hanging by a thread. So we went to CVS, it had to be a sure thing. This time Jeff went in, I was going to lose it if I went in, no matter what. After about ten minutes Jeff finally comes out with a pack of tests. Success!

I have to add that this whole time I was dying to go to the bathroom. I got home and raced up the stairs and ripped open the package and... only one line! Phew! I'm not opposed to another child, but uh, not this year. I knew it was a very long shot, but I was paranoid anyway.

I felt I needed to share this because it's just one of those funny things that only would happen to me. Who else would have SO much trouble obtaining a simple pregnancy test?!?!